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Post subject: The (late) OBL joke thread
 Posted: May 03, 2011 - 06:43 PM
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Location: Walthamstow
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| Didn't BP get fined for dumping shit in the sea? |
_________________
When I was a child, my dad tried to force-feed me.
After a while, my mum said, "Just use a spoon, Mike. You're not a Jedi."
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Post subject:
Posted: May 03, 2011 - 06:43 PM
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Osama Bin Laden's famous last words:
"Hey Ali, what does this "add a location to my tweets" button do?" |
_________________
When I was a child, my dad tried to force-feed me.
After a while, my mum said, "Just use a spoon, Mike. You're not a Jedi."
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Post subject:
Posted: May 03, 2011 - 06:47 PM
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| Coincidentally, an anagram of Osama Bin Laden is "Lob da man in sea" |
_________________
When I was a child, my dad tried to force-feed me.
After a while, my mum said, "Just use a spoon, Mike. You're not a Jedi."
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Post subject:
Posted: May 03, 2011 - 06:48 PM
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Posts: 4380
Location: Walthamstow
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Apparently, Bin Laden had a 25 million dollar price tag on his head.
What kind of ridiculous, designer turban was he wearing? |
_________________
When I was a child, my dad tried to force-feed me.
After a while, my mum said, "Just use a spoon, Mike. You're not a Jedi."
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BWW |
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Post subject:
Posted: May 03, 2011 - 06:50 PM
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Posts: 4380
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George W. Bush once said that he'd dance on Bin Laden's grave.
He's buried at sea George. Go crazy. |
_________________
When I was a child, my dad tried to force-feed me.
After a while, my mum said, "Just use a spoon, Mike. You're not a Jedi."
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Post subject:
Posted: May 03, 2011 - 11:48 PM
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Member
Joined: Feb 12, 2005
Posts: 14327
Location: Your daily life is your temple and your religion. Kahil Gibran
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Post subject:
Posted: May 04, 2011 - 12:20 AM
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Joined: Oct 24, 2002
Posts: 8075
Location: New Jersey USA
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Bin Laden's Afterlife Surprise
After getting nailed by a Daisy Cutter, Osama made his way to the pearly gates. There, he is greeted by George Washington.
"How dare you attack the nation I helped conceive!" yells Mr. Washington, slapping Osama in the face. Patrick Henry comes up from behind: "You wanted to end the Americans' liberty, so they gave you death!" Henry punches Osama on the nose. James Madison comes up next, and says, "This is why I allowed the Federal government to provide for the common defense!" He drops a large weight on Osama's knee.
Osama is subject to similar beatings from John Randolph of Roanoke, James Monroe and 65 other 18th-century American revolutionaries. As he writhes on the ground, Thomas Jefferson picks him up to hurl him back toward the gate where he is to be judged.
As Osama awaits his journey to his final very hot destination, he screams, "This is not what I was promised!"
An angel replies: "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for you. What did you think I said?"
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Not an eye for an eye is the golden rule
Just leaves a room full of blind men...DMB
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Post subject:
Posted: May 04, 2011 - 01:07 AM
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The OBL jokes are flying fast and furiously. Here's a selection:
- "You seem like you're in a good mood. You folks enjoy the Osama bin Laden season finale?"
-- David Letterman
- "How about those Navy SEALs? They jump out of a helicopter and they break into the compound, and they fire a warning shot into his head."
-- David Letterman
- "It was the first Twitter death rumor ever that turned out to be true."
-- Jimmy Kimmel
- "I'm as giddy as a schoolgirl who just shot bin Laden in the eye. I hope I am never again this happy over someone's death."
-- Stephen Colbert
- And my personal favorite,
"Well the good news is, bin Laden lived to see the royal wedding."
-- David Letterman
__________
"I've never wished a man dead, but I have read some obituaries with great pleasure."
-- Mark Twain |
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(\__/)
(='.'=)
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Post subject:
Posted: May 04, 2011 - 01:35 AM
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Posts: 15102
Location: CA
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Post subject:
Posted: May 04, 2011 - 02:27 AM
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Posts: 16181
Location: Jaw Jah
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How to put this?
I have a problem celebrating anyone's death, even him...
He's finding out that his God is not the one he's facing
right now....poor bastard..... |
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Post subject:
Posted: May 04, 2011 - 02:41 AM
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Mine wasn't for him...it was for the "wife" he supposedly used as a shield during the gunfire...I'm not celebrating any of this...for there is not going to be good things coming...
It's just a Joke thread though...remember?...Lighten UP?
(btw..she didn't die) |
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Post subject:
Posted: May 04, 2011 - 03:20 AM
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Location: Your daily life is your temple and your religion. Kahil Gibran
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Wow! That brought back some odd memories. I remember being a kid on the school playground when I heard the news that Patsy had died. Didn't know that old memory was still hanging around.  |
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Johnny_Turbo |
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Post subject:
Posted: May 04, 2011 - 04:47 PM
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Trump wants to see the death certificate.
He was killed in Abbottabad? "I'm Abbottabad boy"--Lou Costello Hussein's on first...
He was rumored to say, "Oh, this is just great! And I have a brand new batch of gajar ka murabba maturing in the refrigerator!!" |
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"The problem with price quotes on the internet is you cannot confirm their validity."--Abraham Lincoln
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Post subject:
Posted: May 04, 2011 - 06:41 PM
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Post subject:
Posted: May 05, 2011 - 03:13 AM
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Post subject:
Posted: May 06, 2011 - 04:51 PM
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A guy walks into a bar
The bartender asks him what he would like.
The guy says a "bin laden".
The bartender says what's a "bin Laden"?
The guy responds - two shots and a splash of water. |
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kstahmer |
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Post subject:
Posted: May 06, 2011 - 06:22 PM
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Post subject:
Posted: May 07, 2011 - 02:47 AM
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Location: Your daily life is your temple and your religion. Kahil Gibran
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| kstahmer wrote: |  |
The images are going too fast to read the captions. |
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kstahmer |
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Post subject:
Posted: May 07, 2011 - 03:53 AM
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Post subject:
Posted: May 07, 2011 - 08:59 AM
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Joined: Apr 14, 2004
Posts: 11590
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| No, Dick, shooting someone in the face does not make you a Navy SEAL! |
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"It's never too late to be who we might have been" George Elliot
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Post subject:
Posted: May 07, 2011 - 09:48 AM
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Location: Your daily life is your temple and your religion. Kahil Gibran
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| kstahmer wrote: | | Increased frame delay from 1.75 seconds to 4.0 seconds. |
Much better. Now this old lady can actually read the captions.
Yesterday, I did screenshots of each one so that I could stop and read them, but I am glad that you slowed them down as now they are more readable. |
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Post subject:
Posted: May 07, 2011 - 09:28 PM
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Joined: Oct 24, 2002
Posts: 8075
Location: New Jersey USA
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| "Apparently, members of Al Qaeda are online slamming the U.S. I don't understand why they're so upset. Everyone in Al Qaeda just got a promotion." -—Craig Ferguson |
_________________
Not an eye for an eye is the golden rule
Just leaves a room full of blind men...DMB
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kstahmer |
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Post subject:
Posted: May 07, 2011 - 09:30 PM
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Frame delay is tricky.
Too fast, it's distracting. Too slow, it's boring.
With that in mind:
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(='.'=)
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Post subject:
Posted: May 08, 2011 - 08:23 AM
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| Not sure what's worse for Osama: the fact he got found and killed, or that he now has to explain to a bunch of suicide bombers where their virgins are. |
_________________
When I was a child, my dad tried to force-feed me.
After a while, my mum said, "Just use a spoon, Mike. You're not a Jedi."
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BWW |
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Post subject:
Posted: May 08, 2011 - 02:11 PM
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BBC news: 8 suicide bombers blow themselves up in Afghanistan, killing two people
I can't help thinking that Bin Laden might have been the brains behind Al Qaeda |
_________________
When I was a child, my dad tried to force-feed me.
After a while, my mum said, "Just use a spoon, Mike. You're not a Jedi."
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